So...today mark the official halfway point...the top of the mountain pass where it is all supposed to be downhill from here. I'm not sure I would describe the halfway point as the top of the mountain...mountain tops symbolize beauty, peace and tranquility to me (where I should be twirling and singing "the hills are alive with the sound of music...falalalalala")...none of which aptly address my state of mind right now at the "halfway point" of my first semester of law school. I think a better analogy (one I will steal from Bob Marvel and twist for my own intents and purposes!) would be that of being in the bowels of the bat caves with no functioning flashlight or even an indiglow (sp?) watch to guide myself out of the inky, pitch blackness I feel engulfing me right now...and engulfed I feel right now. I will say law school is an emotional roller coaster and today I got hit by a mack truck!!! I feel like I know nothing or at least I can't apply anything I've learned and that is so not a good thing! Please keep me in your prayers. I don't understand why I am here and I don't know if this is where I should remain, but until further notice this is where I am. As stupid and miserable as I feel and as much as I don't want to crack another book or sit in the library one minute more, I need to try to move forward until God tells me otherwise. This is so underscored by an email I got from my law mentor...of which I do not believe it was an accident I have been matched with...here's what she sent me...This is from my application section of my Bible study this week. I think we both need to hear and heed it. "Have you encountered a difficult person or circumstance and begun to think that you must be out of God's will? Learn from Moses the important truth that difficulties encountered doing God's work are usually evidence that you are right where God wants you! If you determine to obey God and follow Him, He will orchestrate circumstances to test the sincerity of your commitment. ..... He will also bring you into a spacious place where He will give you the very things He has caused you to desire. Will you keep on, even when things seem to not go well? How will you trust God to bring you through the difficulties?"
So...things that make you go hmmmmm. So, I hope this post hasn't been too much of a downer for you. Oh...I did get some fun in today. My classmate Amy is celebrating her birthday on Sunday. Because of that I got to enjoy an amazing tapas dinner with Amy, her husband Brian and some of their friends in Corvallis. It was so fun to be in a super fun restaurant, having fun with friends and forgetting the realities of law school even if but for a couple of hours. For you visual folk...enjoy the picture of myself, Amy and Brian. (Sorry I still haven't figured out how to do captions!!! The girl can get into law school, but can't figure out captions!!!)
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